Jerome at the Olympics – Story of the day

The good ol’ boys were gathered around the checker board, as near the wood stove as flannel shirts would permit, discussing the events of the world when something somebody said reminded Uncle Jerome of his visit to the Olympics many, many years before.

“Well, we didn’t think the Olympics’d ever be that close to the Holler in our lifetime so me and my two brothers decided we’d go see what the fuss was all about. We didn’t know you needed tickets to get in and when we got to the gate and had no tickets, the guard wouldn’t let us in.

“There were some fellers selling tickets but we’d scraped all we could get together just to put gas in the old Ford to get there and we sure couldn’t afford tickets.

“While we were standing there discussing what to do next, a whole buncha athletes in their uniforms, carrying whatever toy they were competing with, came up to the gate, announced their sport and were waved through.

” Now you know my older brother, Bill, is a right sharp figgerer so by and by he said ‘Fellas, I know how we can get in. Watch me’

“With that, he stripped down to his boxer shorts and tee shirt, picked up a pole that was layin’ there on the ground, ran up to the gate and announced ‘Javelin’ and the guard waved him on through.

“Seein’s how he’d got in, I stripped down to my BVD’s, pulled a manhole cover up, tucked it under my arm, and ran up the gate and announced ‘Discus’ and the guard waved me on through.

“Well, we stood inside the gate to see what ol’ Bubba would do to get in and he undressed like we had but he couldn’t find a sporting implement. Finally he found some barbed wire somewhere, bundled it up as best he could and ran up to the guard and announced, ‘FENCING’”.

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